Friday, November 8, 2013

It's Not about you: How being shy is egotistical

I've already briefly mentioned the Bali Eco Lodge we stayed in during our recent holiday, but I didn't tell you about the talk we had with one of the owners, Norm. The three-hour talk quite probably changed my life (only my actions following the talk with prove that or not) but one minor thing he said has affected my outlook greatly.

When he described getting up in front of a room full of people to discuss permaculture, my response was, "I could never do that, I'm shy". Norm simply replied, "It's not about you". He went on to explain how he had to go on national television once and was extremely nervous, he simply remembered no-one was watching to see him, they were only interested in what he had to say and so focused on that.

That's when I realised every time I have said "I'm shy" that's my ego speaking. What's worse is my ego had developed a victimised strategy of dealing with social situations, "it's hard for me because I'm shy" is really just an excuse for getting out of things.

This amazingly simple idea has already allowed me to say yes to a few things I wouldn't have considered before, because of my shyness. For starters I have booked a hair/ makeup/ photography session with a friend of mine so I can have some nice pictures while I have my Bettie Bangs in. 

The idea of that much attention is very uncomfortable for me, but then I remember - even getting my photograph taken is not about me! It's about the moment in time I'm looking to capture with a friend. The same can be said for doing things out of your comfort zone: why not sing that karaoke song? It's not about you, it's about having fun with friends.

Once you take your own ego out of the equation there is nothing to be afraid of! Are you shy? Then just remember, it's NOT about you. There is no I in shy. 

No comments:

Post a Comment